We'll take our hearts outside...I'll watch the stars go out...

So yeah.  I don't come here very often anymore.  However, for the first time in what seems like ages, I actually have some time to kill, so I figured I'd check up on y'all.  ;D

The thing is, I really don't know what there is to do here anymore.  The band forums have pretty much gone down the shit hole, so I'm kinda afraid to set foot in them nowadays...

That, and...judging by all the scheiss I posted here two-three years ago (I just looked through it all...ah, nostalgia.  Hah), I'm really not the same person I was back then.  As in, I'm really not the kind of gal you'd want to hang around anymore.  I guess everyone has their emotional/social peaks and depressions?

Anyway, I'm going to poke around here for a bit, for shits and gigs.

If you actually do want to talk to me, I am on this little site called...Facebook.

Just message me and I'll present you with some useful information which can be utilized when searching for my whereabouts there?

I'm hoping to hear from some of you soon?

^_^

~tr

Panic [no "!" anymore, apparently] at the Disco's new album. I've been listening to it on loop, pretty much, for the last two days. Eh...bonus points for creativity - I mean...do you know of any other band who's pulled off Folk/Cabaret/Rock so well (Actually, I don't know of any other band who have tried it!)? Didn't think so. Still, I really do like their first album better.

Mebbe I'm more of an Electronica/Cabaret/Rock person? Hehe, I like musikk one can dance to! *Rocks out to I Write Sins, Not Tragedies*

...Anyhoo, this is my favorite song off the new album. It's called "Do You Know What I'm Seeing?" For some reason, I'm picturing a couple - a starving-artist-esque guy and a boring-looking girl. They're taking a walk outside in this psychadelic-like place - kind of like when Jude&Co were on the crazy bus in Across the Universe, and they ended up in that trippy place - anyway, the guy is strolling along, daydreaming, and singing this, as things progressively trippier. The chica is just like "wtfm8?" + then he's alone at the end...awh...

Clouds are marching along, singing a song, just like they do.


If the clouds were singing a song, I'd sing along, wouldn't you too?
If you just knew what they could do.


Oh, if you just knew, what would they do?
And if the birds are just all the words flying along, singing a song,
What would they do?
If they just knew what they could do.


Oh, if they just knew.



I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


No, it never gave a damn about me.



I know it's mad, but if I go to hell
Will you come with me or just leave?
I know it's mad, but if the world were ending
Would you just kiss me or just leave me?
Just leave me?

Clouds are singing a song, marching along, just like they do.


If the clouds were playing a song, I'd play along, wouldn't you too?
If you just knew what they could do.


Oh, if you just knew, what would they do?
And if words are just hollow birds, flying along, singing a song,
What would they do?
If they just knew what we could do.


Oh, if they just knew.



I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


No, it never gave a damn about me.



I know it's mad, but if I go to hell
Will you come with me or just leave?
I know it's mad, but if the world were ending
Would you just kiss me or just leave me?
Just leave me?

I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


I know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
And it never gave a damn about me.


No, it never gave a damn about me.

I found out last night that my aunt and uncle's dog had to be put to sleep...Rest In Peace Meg.  You were a good dog, and you lived your long life ( sixteen years!  ^_^) to the fullest. 

Then I dreamed that my dog had to be put to sleep...I woke up bawling my eyes out...then I went downstairs and hugged her so tightly that I'm surprised she didn't turn around and nip me!  ;D  She's a crab, but I love her.

For the record, I, like most people, support euthanasia for animals.  Also; I, unlike most people, support euthanasia for humans, as well (Well, we're animals too, but you get the point, right?).  Isn't it called assisted suicide or something?  Anyway, yeah...I mean, if I had huge, leaking tumors popping up all over me (like Meg did), I'd want to be put to sleep, too. 

Then the Animal-Rights-Freak part of my mind started pondering...Is it fair to put animals to sleep if you don't know for sure that they'd WANT you to do so?  I mean, with humans, at least you'd KNOW that they'd want to end their life, right?  What do you think?

 

(Mark your calenders, for this is the day that I, for once, post an almost-serious, non-random blog here!  Hehehe...This is an essay I'm doing for my English class.  I have until Monday morning to revise it, so any suggestions/opinions on it right now would be greatly appreciated!  Just remember, if you're going to tell me that a certain part of it is awesome...or if a certain part of it sucks arse, please elaborate and tell me WHY you think so!  One of my greatest pet peeves are people who don't back up their opinions.  Anyway...it's really freaking long, so happy reading!)

 

     Music follows me everywhere, whether I like it or not.  I oftentimes have multiple songs simultaneously playing in my head, and, unfortunately, it tends to distract me from whatever it is I'm doing.  However, there is a part of me that always wants to hum along with every tune that pops into my head and appreciate it before it fades away and another song takes its place. Whether I'm listening to my iPod, singing in choir, writing a song, or just listening to a song playing on loop in my head, music always manages to find me at some point during the day, and I always welcome it.  My love of music is, in a way, like any stereotypical "obsession."  However, contrary to popular opinion, I believe that a little obsessing can be healthy.  Having an obsession provides one with both comfort during unpleasant times and relief when anxiety strikes.  One is able to set goals for both oneself and their obsession, and, when they achieve these goals, a sense of fulfillment is felt - a sense that one has accomplished something worthwhile.  My obsession with music comforts me, relieves my anxiety, and gives my life a purpose. 

            When I moved here four-and-a-half years ago, I was going through a phase that many a person goes through at some point during their adolescence - a phase where one feels purposeless, misunderstood, and evanescent.  I had no idea what I wanted, nor what others expected of me.  I was utterly confused when, upon entering the counselor's office the week before school started, I was presented with a schedule that contained six openings - for each of these openings, I was expected to pick a class.  After filling these openings with all of the classes I was required to take that semester, the first opening on the schedule was still empty.  According to the counselor, the only first hour class with room left for another student was choir - if I didn't want to be in choir, I would have to redo my entire schedule.  I decided that I didn't need any more confusion - as I printed "Symphonic Choir" in the remaining opening, the pencil seemed to want to fly out of my hand and save me from the unnecessary humiliation into which I was putting myself.  Images of Sister Mary, the music teacher at the small, rural Catholic school which I previously attended, plagued my mind, her mouth forming yellow-toothed grin as she made me sing scale after scale after scale.  Sure enough, when I walked into the choir room on the first day of ninth grade, my baggy clothes and long, never-cut hair hanging off of me, I could immediately tell that I was different from the rest of the people there.  However, when we started singing, I felt the clashing contrast between the other students and myself dissolve in the harmony, and, for the first time, I truly enjoyed music. 

               Once in a while, I think about what might have happened if I hadn't signed up for choir that semester, if I felt up to changing around that schedule.  What would my life revolve around today?  Would I look and act the same as I do now?  Would I be just as happy as I am now? 

            Today, music is a vital part of my life.  I am still in choir, and I am studying Italian opera as well.  Many of my friends are in bands, and I hope to be in one soon as well.  Whenever I sing, and whenever I listen to the music of one of my favorite bands, I feel a sense of happiness which I cannot seem to experience in any other situation.  As the melodies and harmonies seep inside me, they brush up against feelings, and untie emotions.  As different as every song I hear makes me feel, I know that each one reflects a separate component of myself.  I believe that, since that nerve-racking morning nearly half a decade ago, my purpose in life has been defined by the dynamic quality of music.  Both it and myself are ever-changing creatures.  We have bipolar tendencies; each of us are able to go from an upbeat rhythm to a minor key within seconds.  We can be forte and powerful one moment, but slow, meandering, and pianissimo the next.  It's impossible to define either of us with a single label or genre, because each of us is made up of countless components, disguised as a single entity. 

            I believe that music is able to help many a person and treat many an ailment.  Along with relieving depression and anxiety, certain studies have shown that music is capable of curing certain neurological conditions - this is known as music therapy.  Incorporating music into therapy for patients suffering from conditions such as Alzheimer's, dementia, and Parkinson's disease is a fairly new concept; "...[It] has been an established medical practice since the 1950s...within the last ten years, three schools have been established to train and certify musicians to play therapeutic music" (Richards, Johnson, Sparks, and Emerson).  According to body-mind-skills specialist Shirley Archer, "Music therapy works by stimulating parts of the brain that are associated with music...For example, in a person with Alzheimer's disease...Listening to music...can indirectly stimulate the recall of memory fragments that otherwise could not be retrieved."  Seeing that music has earned itself a place in the medical field, I believe that more people will be able to appreciate the importance of it as I do.

            My strong appreciation for/obsession with music has kept me grounded in these recent years.  It pulled me out of a sea of incomprehensible depression and abstract wishes, and gave me a purpose, a passion, and a way in which to define myself.  Whether it surrounds me or is confined to the back of my mind, it is always there for me, ready to give me confidence and motivation.  I hope it follows me through the rest of my life. 

(I wrote this about a month ago, when my computer wasn't working.  *teartear*  It's on le FailSpace.)

I'm telling you, it CAN be done!

...As many of you know, I am a full-blown internet addict.  I'm online at least twice a day, and, even then, I'll get these nearly-irresistable urges to check my email, FailSpace, etc during the day.  And you know what?  I can't even think of a rational reason WHY I'm this way, why my life seems to revolve around the world wide web...maybe it's b/c people are always ready to talk here, or because I have a slight case of hypergraphia, and have to write about absolutely EVERYTHING...or maybe because I really do have no life, and nothing better to do.  The internet is like crack for me.

Except, I'll probably get fat and near-sighted from it, instead of skinny and brain-damaged.

Recently, my mother (who knows next to nothing about computers) was online, and my computer claimed that it had 40+ viruses.  That little devil...the things it does for attention...anyway, my mother freaked out, of course, and banned everyone from the comp.  "Everyone" meaning everyone in the house except herself, my brother, and my father...AKA...just me. 

My father came and looked at it, and found out that someone had turned the firewall off (I have no fucking idea who did this)...Well, he needed SOMEONE to blame this on, and, since I was there, and I was neither his beloved son nor wife, he decided that this someone should be me. 

[See why I always complain about my family?!  Hah, at least I have valid reasons, huh?]

[I'm using a CPU in the NMC libe right now]

Well, here is a list of fun, productive (AKA tedious, mind-numbing) things you can do, if you are ever unfortunate enough to be in the same situation as I am in at the moment.  ;)

1.  Read every single book in your house.  After you've finished rereading all of your own books, move on to your little brother's old books - you know, the ones with the talking cars and trucks?  After you've read all those front-to-back, go into the kitchen and read / drool over all the cookbooks, and then, if you're really, reely desperate, go into your study and read all those archaic-looking, dusty tomes that probably haven't left the shelf in your entire life...but try not to glance over at the computer, or you may start crying.

2.  Then there are always the labels on jars, cans, etc.

3.  Watch Disturbia.  That d00d will feel your pain.

4.  Build a cute little house out of twinkies.

5.  Get a pair of binoculars and spy on your neighbors...you never know; one could be a serial killer!

6.  So, after all this reading and spying, your eyes will probably feel about ready to fall out of their sockets...so sleep!  Sleep b/c you're tired, and b/c your eyes burn...and then, after they've stopped burning, and you're not tired anymore...keep.  Sleeping.  Sleepallyoucansleep!  Dream about high-speed internet, strong coffee, and those cute mice that light up...

7.  Call a friend or your BF / GF and see if they have anything interesting to say.  If they don't, make them talk to you anyway.  Guilt-trip, if necessary:  Tell them that you're crying tears of mind-numbing boredom, and that you're so bored that you now know that there are 57 tiles on the ceiling in your kitchen, and that, one day, you'll paint a portrait of them up there, if they rescue you from your tomb of tediousness!

8.  After they get tired of you repeatedly asking them "So, what are you doing now??" and hang up on you, sleep some more.  Dream about those happy, shiny, light-up mousies again.

9.  Find a random closet in your house and take everything out of it.  I don't know why this feels so good; it just does.

10.  It feels even better if you throw the stuff away!

11.  Clean absolutely everything in your house.  Dust the stair rail, clean the windows, vacuum floor and furniture, etc.  Then freak out like a maniac every time you see someone touch a window, or wear their shoes in the house...or take a glass out of that cupboard which you so meticulously organised...

12.  Bake things.  Lots of things.  Use up all the flour and sugar, and watch how pissed off your mother gets!  >: D  However, if your cakes and cookies start coming out of the oven shaped like miniature computers / mice, I'd start to worry...

13.  Now it's time to go outiside (Yes, the place known as "Outside" still exists, and people still go to it.)...Yeah, I said it!  There are lots of things you can do outside...

14.  Build a freaking moat!  Just grab a fairly good size shovel and dig a trench around your house...then, wait for it to rain, and voilá!  You've got a moat!  If you want to be extra-fancy, you can even get a piece of wood that spans the width of the trench, and say it's a toll bridge!  ;)  Make sure to have a password, too - I mean, if you can't have fun in your house, you can at least have fun trying to keep people out if it, right?    

15.  Sit on your front porch and stare at people.  Don't talk, don't wave, just STARE.

...IDK, it's fun.

16.  Go inside, get a piece of paper and a pen, and write a list like this one.  Even though you didn't really do any of the things on this list, you've suddenly got this insane urge to blog...you keep looking for the "Preview and Post" button on the countertop on which you are writing...but you can't see it...you so desperately want to post this blog...you snap your pen in half, and...LyK, OMG$%^$*$*&*$%&$^**%^*%^*^%*%^*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111

I'm in the compy lab, once again, waiting for class to start.

Here's another one of those clichéd discussion-esque blogs for you.

Believe it or not, I'm okay with labels {Just to clarify, I'm not talking about the type that come on soup cans!}.  Labels help us distinguish between different ideas and whatnot - imagine if we couldn't do that! 

...I guess the world would still function, but things would certainly be a lot more confusing!

If people want to label themselves, then they should just go for it.  There's nothing wrong with that - It's just a form of defining yourself, and everyone should be able to know who you are, right?  RIGHT?

However, just because you put yourself under that label DOESN'T NECESSARILY mean you have to be a part of EVERYTHING that fits under that label - Hey, it's okay to wear polos and Tripp pants together, alright?  Whatever makes you happy.  Haha.

I actually don't put myself under any sort of label.  Psh, I like so many different types of things...If I tried to stereotype them all, and then build a label out of all those stereotypes, it would probably be something along the lines of...DHRJRTJHRTHRTHH

"So Laura, what kind of style do you like best?"

"Me?  Oh, I'm really into the whole DHRJRTJHRTHRTHH thing right now; how about yourself?"

XD

However, one should not force labels on other people.  I mean, what if someone decided to refer to you as...oh, say "DHRJRTJHRTHRTHH," without your consent at all?  Yeah, you'd probably be pissed (Unless you're me...hah.../facepalm).

So, I personally prefer to live life sans-labels. 

What about you?

What do you think of labels?

[:(...Sniffle...I knew this day would come, eventually.]

Well, here is my failspace:  myspace.com/xtwilightxrainx

So...I started classes at the local college a few weeks ago, and my life has pretty much dissolved into a gigantic pool of chaos.  Fortunately, it's mostly the good type of craziness, but there has been some drama (Post-high school drama...d00d, there's no escape!). 

Overall, college is pretty sweet.  I was put in the hardcore math and chem classes, but, for some reason, everything we're doing in those classes is review for me, so that's pretty cool!  And then I'm in a normal history class...Haha, I got like...somewhere between 85 and 95% on the last two tests, and I haven't even opened the book yet!  Oh, and then there's choir...choir is always fun.  I met another Wiccan chica in my section, so that's cool.

The whole hanging-out-with-friends deal has changed a lot for me, too.  A lot of my peeps are still at the high school - which is right next door, so I go + visit them / laugh at their high-school-ness - so there's just a little group of us here.  And, for some odd reason, the majority of this group are guys, so I don't get a lot of  girl time these days.  Haha.  Oh well.  I never get tired of talking about vid games and dagohir.

Oh my gosh, <i>dagohir!</i>  Best sport ever (I say it's a sport; don't argue with me!)!  Google it.  Feast your eyes on the awesomeness.  I got my BF to play a few days ago, + now he's mad into it!

Yeah, I have a BF now - I think our one-monther will be next weekend.  ^_^

This is where the drama is...I love him to bits, but...this relationship just feels really different.  To make a long story short, he's ready for stuff that I'm not ready for, and we've had a few semi-arguments over this stuff.  Haha, and then he has a crazy ex, who's been giving him trouble ever since he started dating me, I guess.  + I feel really bad about that.  :(

But!  Other than that, things have been peachy.  Well, as peachy as you can get, when you're working twenty hrs a week, and you have class Mon through Thurs...

 

 

Dude, I leave for what, two days, and, when I come back, this place is completely different! 

Okay, so my excuse for leaving this time is my "band" - It takes a lot of time + effort to start a band - especially if you're someone like me, who has no fucking idea what they're doing! 

But no, I haven't forgotten about this place! 

Hope everyone's having a fantabulous week!

• Only list 8 facts
• You must then 8 TAGS at the end of your post. This means you must name 8 people on Buzznet who now must do the same blog.
• Go comment on their profile and tell them to come read yours! I want to see some fucking participation. :)

{Larz776 tagged me!}

1.  I have a fear of rejection / failure, and I definitely won't admit that to anyone in person.

2.  I know I may seem like a very independent individual - and I am - but I feel that I need one special person to be there for me - good friend, lover, whatever.  And, when I have no one, it hurts.  It's the most painful thing, emotionally, that I've ever felt...although I try my best not to show it, and save my bitching for online.

3.  I LOVE the arts and I LOVE science.  It feels like the two sides of my brain are locked in some sort of battle, all the time!

4.  I talk really loudly, and sing even louder. 

5.  There's a bipolar elf named Dmitri living in my microwave.

6.  I'm more random than a dead baby in a picnic basket.

7.  I sing along to my musikk...when no one's listening...

8.  I may look kinda delinquent-like / stupid / just plain psycho, but I always aim to succeed, and I don't do any sort of drugs (I kid you not!). 

Over the last few years, the right and left sides of my brain have been locked in a battle of knowledge, each side trying to be superior over the other.  For once, I’m not up for any sort of compromise.  I feel that I have to make a choice now.  And I’m one of the most indecisive people you’ll ever meet…so I know this will be difficult.

 

I think I’ve been into artsy stuff ever since…Well, ever since I started finger-painting…which was probably before I started walking!  Drawing / painting was never really my thing (Heh…you should’ve seen some of those finger paintings…), but I was into pretty much everything else.  Nowadays, I especially like designing / customizing  clothes, furniture…whatever.  I think it would be fun to redo a house someday.  I’m also into cooking – This is probably the only thing I could say I’m “gifted” with, seeing that, even if I’m not that sure of what I’m trying to make, everything always turns out okay…No burnt cookies, etc.  It’s really weird.  Oh, and then there’s singing and theatre – probably my two favourite things on the face of the earth right now.

 

Well, at the beginning of high school, I had my heart set on being some sort of writer.  Then…I had Honors ILA.  That class freaking drove me insane – I remember, on more than a few occasions, sitting and staring at a paper I was writing until the sun went down and my eyelids felt like they had lead weights on them, meticulously checking it over, and then asking half the people I know to edit it the next day.  Then I would turn the bloody thing in…and it would almost always come back covered in nasty red marks…like all the details I had gone over so many times had just been hacked out…haha.  Anyway, that class made me rethink what I wanted to do with my life, and, after taking AP lang (the year after), I totally ditched the idea of being a writer of any sort, because I had found something else that interested me.

 

I had become a full-on crime TV addict then, and the forensic science (though it was probably dramatized somewhat) in the shows I was watching really fascinated me.  I had just finished Honors chem, and, although it really challenged me, I liked most of it.  I researched this profession some more, and I found out something <i>really</i> nice about it – </i>Forensic scientists actually have money!</i>…which is something that most writers don’t acquire easily!  I figure that the reason they earn so much money is that they’re actually <i>helping</i> people – They help fight crime - something of which this world definitely has too much.  Do writers do anything important for this world?  To be honest, I can’t think of anything, let alone anything more important than fighting crime.  And so, up until now, I’ve had my heart set on pursuing a career in forensic science, and maybe keeping a few artistic endeavors as side projects.  However, not long after I registered for my classes this fall, I saw that, in the long run, I’m only going to have room in my life for one thing or the other…In other words, either the art or the science will have to go.

 

I have a three-part chem class this fall, which, undoubtedly, will take up at least 75% of my study time.  In fact, I figured I would be so busy studying for chem that I dropped English 111 – I’ll have to take it eventually, but I just can’t focus on those two classes at the same time.  I figure that, if I keep studying chem in college, I’ll end up with a job that will also take up at least 75% of my time – severely restricting time I could spend chillaxing (AKA, I’ll be a gigantic stress-ball.), doing any sort of hobby, or being with my family – that is, if I even end up starting a family, with my work and all.  <i>But</i> I would have money.  Enough money to have a lot of things that a lot of people aren’t able to have.  I’m starting to wonder if this is even going to be worth it.

 

Sometimes, I imagine what my life will be like if I decided to pursue writing again.  I don’t have the patience to actually write books, so I’d probably want to either write or edit stuff for a newspaper or magazine.  I wouldn’t make a lot of money – and, truthfully, my LA-related experiences in high school really made me think about what my chances are of actually succeeding in a career like this – especially with the limited job opportunities of the like around TC – but I would definitely be happy, or at least unstressed.  I’d also have time to stay in music and theatre – related stuff, and I’d probably have time to start a family, if I ever wanted to.  Honestly, the term “starving artist” has this strange, unique appeal to me!  I wouldn’t have much in the way of money, but I would manage…I think.

 

For now, I’m going to keep pursuing the degree I’ve decided to go for – It requires the most credits out of all the two-year degrees, so, even if I do change my mind, I probably won’t have to take a bunch more classes.  I really don’t know what else I can do.

 

If <i>anyone</i> here has ANY advice for me whatsoever, now’s the time to say so!

It was more fun than poking dead things with a stick!!!!!!!!!

Maria came and picked me up at around seven pm Thursday evening.  I had Mapquested directions from here to Houghton Lake, so we wouldn't get lost...I mean, we both lived in HL at some point in our lives, so why would we be in danger of getting lost, anyway?

Yes, we did end up getting lost, and, ironically, the directions I brought were at fault - not us!  Apparently, we were supposed to turn onto some exit that didn't exist!...Heh.  Never trust the Internet, children!

After picking up Meghan, we headed down to Detroit.  We got to Meghan's aunt's house at about two am, and just decided to crash. 

A few hours later, we were up again, getting ready for the concert!  I made a feeble attempt to straighten my crazy-arse hair, put a few wash-out purple stripes in it, used about half a stick of eyeliner, and I was ready to go. 

Ha.  Warped is probably the only time of the year when there are more than a handful of scene kids in Detroit - As we were driving through downtown, we saw a ton of ghetto-like people on the sidewalk - Heh, I felt whiter than sour cream.  As we made our way to Comerica, we started seeing less scary ghetto people, and more scrawny kids in drainpipes...We parked in this random parking lot, and had to walk about a block to Comerica - At last, we were safe!  *Laughs*

There were stages everywhere - We could not, for the life of us, figure out who was playing where and when, so we headed up to the stadium, where there were about 307543475 little tents selling concert shirts - AKA, shirts that one would see at their local Hot Topic, only they cost about three times as much.  Nevertheless, I ended up buying two - I bought a green Paramore shirt, and a shirt from The Vincent Black Shadow's tent - I was already wearing the TVBS shirt that I had made (I'll have to put up pictures of that!), but, for some reason, I ended up getting that one, as well...Oh, come on; it has a girl drowning on it - How cool is that?  ^_^  I got a few compliments on my homemade shirt, though - I noticed that a lot of people were kinda expressing their creativity as well, which was neat - There were a few tents selling homemade stuff, and a lot of people had, like me, made their own concert shirts.

After spending another...like, $5...on a slush, we finally found out when the bands we wanted to see were playing.

The first band we wanted to see was Killswitch Engage.  Um, yeah...they're kinda...hardcore...I really don't know what they were doing at Warped, but Meghan said they were cool, so I was totally up for seeing them.  We managed to get up near the barrier next to the stage, so we were pretty excited...The band came out and started playing...

...and the entire crowd - I kid you not - turned into a mosh pit.  I was immediately pushed into the person in front of me, and another person slammed into my back.  Pretty soon, I was walled in so tightly that I could pick both my feet up off the ground without falling over!  I kept my horns high all through the first song - then the crowd surfing started, so I had to put my hand down.  My ponytail got knocked out, and my bag had ripped, so I decided to get the fuck out of there, like the pansy I am.  Meghan, Maria, and I had already been separated, so I decided to go back and chill at our meeting spot we had found earlier.  As I was leaving, the Wall of Death started - A Wall of Death is where the crowd divides down the middle, and then the sides charge at each other.  O.o  Ehm, yeah, I definitely wouldn't have fared well if I was in that...I'm not the aggressive type...Heh.

Maria was already there.  We waited for awhile, and, after KsE were finished, Meghan pretty much staggered out of the crowd + passed out next to us - She freaking stayed for the entire thing!

Damn, Meghan, your my freaking hero!

Sometime afterward, my mother called, and I panicked - No, my parents would definitely not approve of me going to someplace like Warped, so I didn't bother telling them (*Evil laughter*) - What they don't know won't hurt them, right?  I ran into a bathroom - where, miraculously, it was about as loud as the mall, called her back, and told her I was shopping (which would explain the two shirts I bought, right?).  Now, I'm not on good terms with my parents, but, heck...their level of obliviousness almost makes me pity them...almost.  Heh...

The next band we saw were Paramore.  Paramore were AWESOME - Just as awesome as they sound in their new album!  I think one characteristic of a good band is the fact that they sound just as good live as they do recorded - and Paramore certainly did!  I love Hayley's whole...clashin' in fashion...thing - She was wearing this really mod black and white shirt, and bright yellow pants.  Her hair, which changes colours all the time, is pretty yellow now, as well.  She sang with such intensity - and all their songs are very singalong-able, so we, the crowd, were singing the whole time!  I took a bunch of pictures - Unfortunately, they're on a disposable camera (You definitely don't want to take good cameras to a concert...Especially if you're going to see KsE...Yikes...), so I have yet to get them developed!  I saw some people attempting to mosh, and I freaking wanted to hurt them - It's freaking PARAMORE, people!  Well, I haven't been to a single concert where no moshing was involved, so I guess us Michaganders like our moshing...unfortunately.

After that, Meghan went to see Chiodos, and Maria and I went over to a smaller stage to see TVBS. 

Cassandra Ford was drunk off her tiny little arse, and the guys must've been on crack or something - I was a bit disappointed at first, but then it just became so funny - Cassandra just staggered around the stage, while the guys thrashed around like they were possessed.  Metro, their first song, sucked, but they did pretty well after that - which is what happens when you don't take the time to warm up.  Tsk, tsk.  And, sure enough, there was one guy behind us twirling a shirt and trying to start a mosh pit.  *Rolls eyes*  And then Chiodos, who were about a hundred feet to the left, on a different stage, starting drowning them out.  Tch.

After TVBS and Chiodos had finished, Maria went to see Bad Religion, and Meghan and I went to the main stage to see Coheed and Cambria.

C&C were, in my opinion, the best band of the day - I could barely see anything, save Claudio's hair,  *Laughs* but I did hold my camera up + take a few pictures.  They started off by playing my favourite song of theirs - Welcome Home.  That was probably my favourite moment of Warped.  People were singing along, too, which made it all the more fun.  I'm very Pro-Singing, and very Anti-Moshing...yeah...But there was at least one mosh pit.  *Rolls eyes again*  The one thing that I really liked about them was that they're probably the first band I've ever seen live that didn't say anything stupid or obnoxious on stage - I mean, it's always nice when when a band (Like Paramore) refrain from using / over-using the F-bomb (which, as you can see, I don't have a problem with...to a certain degree, though!), but the whole "ARE Y'ALL HAVIN' FUN TONIGHT?" and "I FEEL LIKE DANCING!" thing gets kinda old, as well!  However, C&C didn't do any of that, which was pretty cool.  I really hope I can see them live again, sometime soon.

After C&C, all the bands we had wanted to see had played, so we left.  On the way back to the car, I started randomly taking pictures, and succeeded in using up all the film on my cruddy little camera. 

Less than two minutes after I had taken my last picture, we saw this guy come out of a nearby building in...I don't even know what it was...It was like a bike, only it had huge handles, and...Ah, man, I can't even explain it, but it would've been an awesome thing of which to take a picture! 

Maria:  WHOOOOAAA, THAT THING IS BITCHIN'!

Dude:  ...Uh, thanks!

He let Maria try it out - but, unfortunately, I don't have a picture of it!  He made it himself, so we'll probably never see anything like it again, either...Oh well.

It was definitely the best concert I've been to, so far.  Meghan's trying to get tickets to OZZfest right now, and I just might go - It would require skipping a few days of class, and probably another elaborate lie to tell my damned parents (Look, they seriously don't like me, and I really don't like them, so...Yeah, you get it.), but, now that Maria's in on the whole concert-freak thing (Meghan and I were getting kinda lonely, haha.), I don't see why we can't just do this whole thing over again next month!

I had a really entertaining evening at work today.

You know I routinely complain about people trying to convert me, right (I usually have some sort of pentagram hanging off of me, and that's basically an invitation for people to do this, so yeah.)?  Well, today, I probably had the most amusing encounter yet.

We were starting to close up when this family came in.  They seemed to be your average TC family:  All were wearing neat, summery polo shirts, and were at least ten skin shades darker than I am. 

I had just pulled the tray of peanut butter fudge out of the showcase, and it was on one of the marble tables, waiting to be refilled.  But they came in right as I was beginning to refill it, so I had momentarily abandoned the tray and gone over to the showcase in front of which they were standing.

Me:  Can I help you?

Man:  Ooooo, what is <i>that</i> over there?  *Points to PB fudge*

Me:  That's peanut butter flavoured.

Man:  Ah, and you just finished making it, of course!  I'll take a slice of that!

Me:  Um...*Deems this guy as yet another unobservant customer and stifles a snicker*  Right-o, then.

Man:  And, I would also like a piece of <i>that</i> FRESH vanilla, over there!  *Points to extra fudge on back counter*

Me:  Well, we have to sell the fudge in the showcase first.  It wouldn't be fair to the other customers if we did otherwise.

Man:  *Laughs his arse off*  But see, I'm making a <i>request!</i>

Son:  [Wow, he was a cocky one.]  But...There aren't any other customers in the store!  [Yeah, a lot of customers try to pull this twisted logic on me.  It gets amusing, after awhile.]

Me:  *Wraps up a piece of vanilla from the showcase*  Well, all the fudge here was made within the last few days.  Now, would you like <i>this</i> piece of vanilla?

Man:  *Stares at me*  I know that fudge may be good, but I'm requesting <i>THAT</i> piece!  *Points, yet again, to the fresh stuff*

Me:  Ahem, NO, this stuff has to be sold first...<i>Now, do you or don't you want this vanilla?!</i>

Man:  ...No!  Just the other one!  *Goes behind sone and wife, picks up daughter (She looked about seven or eight.), says something to her, and puts her down.*

Girl:  *Runs out to car*

I sighed, boxed his fudge, and then the son and wife ordered some.  Right as they left, the girl returned, dropped some pamphlets on the counter, and left with the rest of her family.

I didn't notice the pamphlets, but the chica working with me did. 

Chica (Not sure if she'd want me mentioning her name here):  They're called...*Reads* Answer For Cancer.

Me:  What the...that sounds pretty heavy...

Chica:  *Opens it*  Oh my gosh, it's all about God!

It hit me immediately - When the man had been staring so intensely at me, he had been looking at my pentagram necklace.    When he picked his daughter up, he must've told her to go to the car and bring back a couple pamphlets...while he argued with the stupid Pagan behind the counter.  Maybe he thought that, if I wouldn't give him the god-like treatment he deserved, he could at least pull a fast one + try to convert me without actually confronting me about it.

So...I grabbed one of the pamphlets, opened it up, and busied myself with some Hardcore Enlightenment.  ^_^

The pamplet contains a girl's story about her battle with cancer.  She tells of how her God helped her through her battle, and what He taught her. 

I am most definitely not hating on / ridiculing this girl here - Heck, I hope she's doing okay, wherever she is!  It's what she said in this pamphlet that I don't agree with...But, if believing it helped her though a tough time in her life, then...good for her.  Whatever floats your boat, you know.

I'm too lazy to type up the entire thing (Oo, SLOTH...isn't that a big, bad SIN?), but here are some of the highlights.

This was near the beginning.  "The Bible says 'boast not thyself of tomorrow:  for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth,'.  Today may be the day you die."

<i>Man, this pretty hardcore...too hardcore to be passing out to people in fudge stores, but whatever.  Just my two cents here.</i>

"God sees our hearts - If you compare yourself to a person at work, or your neighbor next door, you may find yourself thinking you are a good person.  But if you compare yourself to the pure law of God, you will find yourself a sinner.  God's law shows that if you have lied, you are a liar; if you have looked at someone with lust in your heart, you have committed adultery.  God's law says that if you have hated someone, you have committed murder.  If you have stolen anything (no matter how small), you are a thief.  Romans 3:23 tells us that we have fallen short of being a good person.  In Revelations 21:8, we are given a list of those who will not enter heaven:  'But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolators, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone:  which is the second death.'  This verse tells us that we are going to hell after we die.  What an unpleasant thought!  We have an inner conscience that tells us to fear death because of our sin.  Our sin is what makes us fear death!"

<i>What the f...</i>[At this point, we were both totally ROFL-ing, because we now know that we're whores - Hey, we've seen a few cute guys lately, and we couldn't help laying our eyes on them!  ]  <i>Whoremonger?  d00d, that must be the best word, ever...Haha.  So how do we make up for all of these horrible sins...?</i>

"...The Bible tells us that doing good works, going to church, visiting nursing homes, giving to charity, etc., will not pay for even one lie we told!  Isaiah 64:6 tells us '...all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags.'"

<i>Whoa.  And I thought Karma was a bitch...I'm really starting to think otherwise, now.</i>

After this, she goes on to say that, pretty much, everyone who sins (AKA, all of us) has a one-way ticket to H-E-double-hockey-sticks, but that, once we've been there for awhile + had some decent torturing, we'll be pure enough for heaven. 

The part about good works not making anyone a better person really shocked me.  How on earth can people go around thinking stuff like this?  I mean, why do people like this value good behaviour so much, then?  Why the HECK do they teach their children that they're going to die + immediately pay a visit to hell?  If kids are raised thinking this, then will they bother to do good works at all?

Well, what do you think?*

*Same rules apply here that apply to my other blogs.  Please clearly state what your opinion is, and why - Stating your opinion and then failing to give it any sort of support does not contribute to the discussion - It just provides an outlet for an argument.  AKA, people can then throw whatever sort of opinion they want back at you, because you have nothing to support your own, nothing that will contradict anything else that is said.  See what I mean here?

Sorry guys, but I have to give my two cents on this topic sometime...

No, just kidding.  I'm not sorry...Maybe this will actually reach out to someone and help them. 

Ha.  Probably not, but it doesn't hurt to try...

Within the last year, about 75% of my friends have started smoking.  At one point during the school year, absolutely everyone I hung out with was a smoker, and, every day during lunch, I would find myself standing in a circle - No, slightly outside the circle - in the middle of the woods, watching my friends smoke their brain cells out.  I should've just gone to the libe and nerded out, but no, I faithfully trailed after my friends, out to the smokehole, and politely chatted while inhaling vast quantities of second-hand smoke.  And, of course, I observed everything else that goes on out there (Yes, I am that much of a loser.).

Besides smoking, regular smokehole entertainment includes, but is not limited to:

~ Destroying various inanimate objects, such as bikes, shopping carts, and stuffed animals.

~ Imbedding cigarette butts into tree trunks, and then pointing at them while laughing hysterically.

~ Seeing who can come up with the most obnoxious, innuendo-filled joke.

Since I'm easily amused, and have an immature sense of humour, I laughed along with most of this, even though I didn't participate in any of it.  Hey, it was either this or Quizilla in the comp lab.

One day, I was flipping through some medical field-related book, and I saw a picture of...Well, I didn't even know what it was, at first.  It looked like a tan-coloured lump with different coloured lumps growing out of it.  I read the caption.

The picture was of the mouth of an individual who had gotten mouth cancer, from tobacco.

I was grossed out beyond belief.  I did some further research on tobacco, and found out that they put some pretty unappetizing ingredients in the stuff -

LIKE FIBERGLASS!

Yeah, I would rather chew [straight-up] glass than smoke.

So, according to some of my smoker friends, smoking alleviates stress.  Well, so does a cup of tea (Sorry, but I'm British, so yeah.).  So does burning incense.  So does taking a nap, stretching, taking a walk, taking a shower, and listening to Death Cab for Cutie.  Ever tried any of that?

Oh, and I guess it makes you look cooler, as well.  Can't let your health crimp your style, huh?

Oh, honestly.  Do you really want to risk rotting your teeth out, losing every last one of your brain cells (If you want living proof of this part, then I'll take you to visit my grandmother, sometime.  She smoked for ~70 yrs, and now she has advanced dementia.), getting heart disease, clogging your lungs with tar, getting a chronic cough, smelling bad, and losing friends, just to look cool + de-stress?

Of course, the decision is yours to make.  But, if you're friends with me, or want to be friends, then you might have to choose between me and your smoke.

Flame away, dearies. 

*Wikifies it*

Atheism, as a philosophical view, is the position that either affirms the nonexistence of gods^[1] or rejects theism.^[2] When defined more broadly, atheism is the absence of belief in deities, alternatively called nontheism.^[3] Although atheists are commonly assumed to be irreligious, some religions, such as Buddhism, have been characterized as atheistic.^[4][5]

Many self-described atheists are skeptical of all supernatural beings and cite a lack of empirical evidence for the existence of deities. Others argue for atheism on philosophical, social or historical grounds. Although many self-described atheists tend toward secular philosophies such as humanism^[6] and naturalism,^[7] there is no one ideology or set of behaviors to which all atheists adhere.^[8]

The term atheism originated as a pejorative epithet applied to any person or belief in conflict with established religion.^[9] With the spread of freethought, scientific skepticism, and criticism of religion, the term began to gather a more specific meaning and was sometimes used as a self-description by atheists.

What do you think of Atheism?  Are you an Atheist?  If so, do you have a set of morals / rules by which you live?  What are they?

 

*Pauses porno flick, lights another cigarette, and throws the remains of her old one into a bag of dry ice...Yes, you have to be eighteen to buy dry ice.*

I'm not a freaking minor anymore!

*Assures you that she was JKing about the cigs, porn, and dry ice.  She swears.*

Actually today pretty much sucked.  I mean, I was all psyched, b/c it's both my bday AND Friday the Thirteenth, and something good always happens to me on Friday the Thirteenth!  But nothing happened today.  Absolutely nothing. 

And I'm still getting over what may be food poisoning, so I can't even have cake (...Well, I could, but I'd probably see it again a few seconds after I eat it, if you know what I mean!).  Oh well.  I don't need cake.  I'm eighteen.  I'm happy.  w00t.

So, as a lot of you did, I went and saw the premiere of HP5 early this morning.  I'm not really obsessed w/ HP, but there are a few matters Rowling has written about that, in my opinion, could expressed any better than the manner of which she used to write about them. 

Remember that one quote of Dumbledore's back in like, the first or second book?

"Sometimes, what is easy isn't necessarily right, and what is right isn't necessarily easy."

Okay, I really don't remember the exact quote, but you get the gist of it, right?

In this movie, Luna Lovegood says something that...I think everyone needs to know.  It was when she was going around the castle, collecting all her stuff (People had strewn her stuff everywhere.).

"Everything has a way of coming back to you, in one way or another."

In other words, that's Karma for you!  Be careful in what you do, because it will happen to you later, in some way, shape, or form!

Well, I'm Wiccan, so that's what I believe. 

I know some people who belong to hardcore religious families who aren't allowed to watch HP, because of the witchcraft.  I guess they think it's an abomination to God, or something...or that, if they walk into a theatre where it's playing, a lightning bolt will come down from the heavens and smite their arses.  I feel really bad for these people, because this means that their parents are practically forcing their beliefs on them. 

So, this is going to be one of those blogs where I ask an &uuml;ber-thought-provoking question, and you're supposed to discuss it amongst yourselves (In other words, comments have to be >10 words, and you have to explain why you think what you think - Laying down you opinion + then peacing out is NOT ALLOWED.)

Do you think religions should be allowed to force their beliefs on certain people?  Are you in a religion that does it?  Do you think that any other religions' beliefs out there are immoral / completely bass-ackwards?  Tell me!

Oh, by the way, Happy Belated Independence Day, everyone!  I had a lot of fun yesterday.  Amber invited me to go watch the fireworks on her boat at the marina (by where the zoo used to be).  We went swimming, and maaaaan, the water definitely hasn't warmed up much!  My knuckles freaking turned purple!  Once it was darker out, we sat on the front of the boat and watched the fireworks with Janelle and two of her friends.  There were these freaking hardcore party animals in a boat near us, and, every once in awhile, we'd hear them scream "YEEEEEAAAAAH  MAAAAAAN!" or something like that.  So we started doing the same thing  *Laughs* whenever there was one of those retarded fireworks that didn't explode right.  Then they tried to out-shout us.  *Laughs again*  Well, we still have the Cherry Festival fireworks AND the Harbor Days fireworks to go, so pyros, don't despair!  ;D

Oh yeah, this blog is supposed to be about exercise.  *Recaptures Train of Thought*

I oftentimes go on walks through my suburb.  I freaking hate suburbs.  Now, if I still lived in HL, I could go for a walk down the fairway on the prettyful golf course I used to live next to, or I could go for a walk through the woods near my house, maybe along the picturesque little creek I found when I was little.  But no, I live in freaking TC now, so I have to walk through our damned, neon-green-lawned suburb (populated by all the upper-middle class snobs in TC).

I go on solo walks for several reasons.

~I have an artist's temperament, and going for a quiet walk is the best way to clear my mind, think about whatever I need to think about at the time, and, ya know, just think happy thoughts.

~I don't have a BF to go on romantic walks with.

~Walking / burning a few Calories every day = smaller arse = A happier, more confident me.

~People point, laugh and throw things at me when I run / jog. 

~I'm reely scurred of driving.  :(

However, a lot of people I know don't seem to understand that I, to a point, am concerned about what I look like.  Yes, I know I wear purple and orange together, and I know my hair doesn't look natural, and I know black nail polish doesn't look cute.  It's not supposed to!  Hey, I know I'm a freak, but I want to be a healthy freak as well! 

One time, while I was walking to work, this lady pulled up in her car and was like "Awwwww, do you need a ride somewhere?...I can't stand seeing a girl walking alone somewhere!"  Hm...I guess I should be doing my walking on a treadmill or something, huh(I said no & kept walking.)?  Unfortunately, I don't have a couple thousand dollars to drop on one of those, so I'm going to have to keep walking through the neighborhood, listening to the birds sing, and enjoying the scenery (which is fairly nice, once you get used to the glare coming off of the neon-green front lawns.).  Yeah, I'll take my chances.  *Laughs*

Today, I was walking home, and that same lady was out in her yard.  She came up to me and was like "Do you walk to...get places...or do you just do it to be healthy?"  I know she was attempting to be nice there, but nevertheless, it struck me as one of those questions that aren't even worth answering.  Yes, I (Gasp!) actually DO walk to get places, unlike so many other Americans (I think everyone knows we're the most out-of-shape country on the face of the planet.)!  I walk to work almost every day - Walking there and back is somewhere between three and four miles, which pretty much cancels out all the Calories I get from eating all the random pieces of fudge laying around there.  ^_^

Some people at work are kind of confuzzled about me walking places, as well.  At least once a week, someone will inquire as to whether or not I have my DL yet, and the managers are even starting to get a bit pissed off at me, since I don't have a car.  According to them, if there isn't a car parked out in front of the store, the place looks abandoned.  Even though the lights are on, the neon sig is glowing, and all four signs say OPEN. 

Last year, I was talking with a girl at school who was an exchange student from Buenos Aires.  She said that, in BA, most people didn't even have cars - You could just walk everywhere, or take the metro. 

It's like that in most other countries, too.  Maybe, if it was like that here in the good old (Actually, we're not old at all, compared to everyone else, so nvm.) US of A, we wouldn't be so overweight and out-of-shape, huh?

Has anyone here read A Walk in the Woods, by Bill Bryson?  It's about this guy's (the writer's) journey down the Appalachian Trail.  Throughout the book, he discusses Americans' general phobia when it comes to exercise, and...well, pretty much everything I've just talked about!  But this guy is so much funnier than I am.  He can even make an encounter with some random, scary creature, in the dead of the night, in the middle of the woods, sound absolutely hilarious.  d00d, just read it; it's probably worlds more entertaining than Fast Food Nation.

Anyway, I did have a point here.  At one point, Bryson mentioned some lady he knew who DROVE A QUARTER MILE to get to...you'll never guess...THE GYM!  It's so ridiculous!  We're ridiculous! 

Yeah, I'm sure there'd be A LOT of bitching going on throughout the nation if all the cars, McDonalds's, and BK Lounges just disappeared.  However, I'm sure that, after a few weeks or so of surviving on (Ew!) fresh produce / stuffins like that, and (Gasp!) walking / biking to get around, so would a good portion of our fat and cholesterol!

Yeah, that's why I haven't been online much lately (Gasp!  It's the Apocolypse!)! 

I worked 9-3 on Saturday.  Derek and Anthony were making the fudge downtown, and Dave and the new guy Kyle were making it here in Acme.  Around noon, Derek called the Acme store, and I picked up the phone.

Derek:  Hello.  Do you put chocolate in your plain chocolate fudge?

Me:  What the eff...

Derek:  *Hangs up*

He called back a few minutes later, and Evey answered the phone.

Evey:  Hello?

Derek:  Hiya do you sell hamburgers?

Evey:  Shut up...

This went on for like, an hour.  *Laughs*  Oh, and then (I think) Anthony called us, and Dave answered.

Dave:  Heya, Murdick's Mortuary here!  You stab 'em, we slab 'em - How can I help you?

Anthony:  ...Is your fudge as sweet as you are?

Dave:  Are you hitting on me, you little faggot?

*Laughs*  After work, I went to Sam's open house at Grace MacDonald park.  A bunch of her little cousins were there, and we played this HARDCORE game of capture the flag!  d00d, I love that game!  I mean, as soon as everyone's finished fighting (In the few games I've played, the "fighting" stage of it usually lasts almost an hour...Ha.) over where the flag should be put, whether or not it should be visible, and, if so, how many leaves are allowed to cover it...etcetera, etcetera, it can get pretty fun!

After I left Sam's open house, I went home and found out that Tabby had called and invited me to her open house...so I was at home for a grand total of maybe 30 minutes.  Right after I got off the phone with Tabby, my mother got paged - She works at the community Blood Center, so, when she gets paged, it means that someone's bleeding their guts out at the hospital, and she needs to take a few chunks of frozen blood over there for them (And, when I'm helping her, I usually get stuck holding the frozen blood while she drives.  What a job...).  Well, I hauled arse up to my room and quickly packed an overnight bag, and then we went to the blood center.

The Blood Center is kinda creepy.  I was leaning on a cooler, watching my mother run around, and I saw something yellow out of the corner of my eye.  I turned around, and realized that the cooler I was leaning on had a huge BIOHAZARD sign on it!  I jumped back and looked around, and realized that there were like, eleventeen of these signs, all within twenty feet of me!  Creepy.

The blood / plasma got to the hospital just fine...I found out later that the victim had been in a motorcycle accident, and had lost both an arm AND a leg.  Guys, please, PLEASE don't ride motorcycles.  I don't care how cool they look, I don't care how well they complement your new tatt...I just don't care.  Don't fucking ride motorcycles.  I'm completely serious.

Tabby had a little bonfire-like thing going...I was kinda totaled from Capture the Flag / running through the hospital with a heavy box of bloodcicles, so I just sat by the fire with Ashley, ate food (which is what I do best at other people's houses...'cause you guys probably have better food than I do.=)), and watched everyone else jump over / stand in the fire like idiots. 

Later on, some more people came over, and we played Super Smash Bros - w00t for N64!  It got pretty intense ("Fuck you Pikachu!"..."Let's all gang up on Kirby and kick the shit out of him!")...*Laughs*  After some hardcore Nintendo-ness, we went downstairs and watched Silent Hill. 

Everyone there had seen Silent Hill except for Carmen.  Hehe, poor Carmen - Everyone else (myself included) just made fun of it all the way to the end, so she probably didn't get the plot of it at all, thanks to us.  After the movie, everyone went home, except for Carmen and myself.  We tore down some streamers in the garage, and then went to bed.

Sunday morning / afternoon, Tabby and I played Conker's Bad Fur Day (That is one raunchy game...but it's absolutely hysterical!)...I had to leave at around three to go take care of my grandma. 

I ended up going to Joann Fabrics after that.  I always get kinda carried away in that store (*Laughs* All the crabby old ladies in there give me the weirdest looks.)...This time, I went in for one box of black dye, and I came out with a couple boxes of green dye, the black dye, and about twelve hundred little thingies of fabric paint, because they're cool and shiny and awesome like that...yeah.

Sunday evening was pretty boring...Well then, on to today!

So...I intended to dye my brown gauchos and (white) wife-beater (which was my only white shirt!) black, and this burgundy sweatshirt bright kelly green (which, supposedly, could be achieved by using twice the amount of dye.).  Well...after sitting in the garage, stirring two smelly buckets of dye for half an hour, and then another hour of rinsing / cleaning stuff, my wife beater turned grey, my gauchos remained brown, and my sweatshirt turned this interesting shade of purple...I shall call it merlot.  It's actually really purty!

Maria called me this afternoon...I guess she's living with Allie now...and I guess Allie only lives like, two miles away from me...wow.  Well, I went down to their house for a few hours, and ate all their food (Heh...)...

And here I be now!  Wow, what a boring blog this has been! 

Unfortunately, my computer was being a lame arse, and would only allow me to record the first minute of it, but anyway, here it is, if you want to listen (You might have to turn the volume up a little; the recording was pretty quiet on my computer, for some reason.):

http://fook-yu.imeem.com/music/IwiiIg1R/fireair/

PLEASE give me some honest opinions here. 

I am looking for FEEDBACK, not PRAISE!

I think the "Breathe, breathe" part sounds kinda weird, but I'm imagining a chorus of voices for that part (+ some other parts in this song, as well), so yeah.  I listened to the recording (It's so weird how different you sound in a recording.), and I think I'm not varying the pitches enough...so yeah, give me some hardcore feedback, please.  And it's okay if you don't understand the lyrics.  I'll elaborate on them if you want...Actually, it'd be cool if you took a stab at finding out what they mean first.  I'd like to hear what you think!  Here are the lyrics:

Fire and Air

The smoke keeps building up
and we're in our element.
licking up what we need...
Give away a breath to
stir up all the embers.
We're in this until we succeed.

Will there ever be a day
when we hold our fire?
Will we never realize
that success is a liar?
 
Breathe, breathe.
My lungs are flaming. [This is where the recording stops.  Damn computer.]
Breathe, breathe.
Endless inferno...
Breathe, breathe.
Sphere of fire...
Sparks ignite and we all blow away.

Was there ever a single time
when we weren't out of line?
Do we feed the spark just for show?
We'll gather, and then we'll dance.
Celebrate disturbance.
For a vict'ry we'll never know.

Will there ever be a day
when we hold our fire?
Will we never realize
that success is a liar?
 
Breathe, breathe.
My lungs are flaming.
Breathe, breathe.
Endless inferno...
Breathe, breathe.
Sphere of fire...
Sparks ignite and we all blow away...

We'll fall one day.
We'll burn with ourselves to blame.
When you're breathing flames
you put yourself to shame.
Feel the breeze on your jaded face...

[Repeat chorus twice...the first repeat here doesn't sound like the others...Nevermind, I can't explain it.]

Sphere of fire...

Well, here it is, Friday night, and I'm at the computer, enjoying my virtual life while trying to forget how pathetic my real life is. 

Anyway, I just found a bunch of poems that I wrote last year, and, since I have nothing better to do, I thought I'd type them up, and you guys can give me some feedback...if you can find any time in your awesome lives.  *Feels like a loser*

Okay, here's how you give proper feedback to someone when they ask you to critique a poem / song / whatever of theirs...Honestly, if you just say something like "Nice job!" it comes across as kinda rude (to me, at least.).  This is how it goes:

I really liked [insert something here] because [insert your opinion here.].  HOWEVER, I really didn't like [insert something here] because [insert your opinion here.].  Saying you don't like something is not rude at all - I'm asking for feedback, not praise! 

Hm, hm...here's a good one...

Feel the Sun

You don't have to be better you just have to be bigger it doesn't need to sound great it only needs to be louder you don't need to be true just cover more up we've been building higher and higher without putting more inside  and we're all inside a hat shop hiding under the glittering brims.

I want to feel the sun wipe off the paint and feel the sun the stuff you just bought to replace all you threw away take care of what you have and feel the sun.

 You've won everything all your life but we can see through you if we want to you know that we don't what will you do if someone does?  You just lie down every night unable to sleep sweating in your costume that everyone loves.

I want to feel the sun wipe off the paint and feel the sun the stuff you just bought to replace all you threw away take care of what you have and feel the sun.

They go, he goes, he goes, you go, I go, we go, she stays - What is WRONG with her?! 

She watches us fall we wouldn't listen we couldn't step out of line...Now it's so dark.

I want to feel the sun wipe off the paint and feel the sun the stuff you just bought to replace all you threw away take care of what you have and feel the sun.

Here's another one...Oh, and if you're wondering what the heck I was thinking when I wrote these, feel free to ask!

Beyond Love

Why love just to love kiss just to kiss hold on to each other 'cause there's nothing else to do?  If life is this way, why can't we "just not and say we did?"  The world has a thin skin and we're only a hollow bone inside it.

Why kiss it's pointless why hold hands it just makes it harder to walk down this road why just "be together" what is the reason why is it "OK?"  Why call and have nothing to say why go nowhere together; it's wasting a day why buy the roses they don't help me at all only glamourous until the water's gone then they're invisible I wonder, would it be the same for me?

I wonder why you're never there when I call, when I fall, I wonder why you never want to go anywhere, lend me a hand unless they ALL want to it wouldn't hurt to ease MY pain, it won't seep into you!

Why love just to love kiss just to kiss hold on to each other 'cause there's nothing else to do?  If life is this way, why can't we "just not and say we did?"  The world has a thin skin and we're only a hollow bone inside it.

Make a prick, just use a pin, I want to make sure there's blood flowing underneath the skin - Do you even CARE? - You're nothing, yet you're there, so look under my mask, it's old and fading...You'll see the pain it's been shading.

My pleas for unmentionable reality strike true.

It wouldn't hurt to help me, but I've been hurting so much helping you...

Why love just to love kiss just to kiss hold on to each other 'cause there's nothing else to do?  If life is this way, why can't we "just not and say we did?"  The world has a thin skin and we're only a hollow bone inside it.